Horrible life:a broken soul

Life is Horrible !! who's life is this ? It's My life of course  I have tried lots of solutions to get my life back to how it was a long time ago but nothing worked well every single solution is a real pain for my broke Soul Because it always fail and that's Horrible Sometimes I just think about How to get ride of This pain and there's only one solution and I'm sure that you really know what I'm talking about but at that time I start to think about what is going to happen after that and it's really  bad and Mysterious I don't know How to explain that but it's just a bunch of Scary and terrible ideas I'm scared from the future and from My past and even My present I can't be Happy neither Sad I'm  a broken soul .